"The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."- Nelson Mandela

I need to get myself back on track with WW. I am falling apart. Not really but it feels like it. I am not good with gaining weight so every pound weighs more than it's worth. I am going to a meeting tonnight which is designed for the last 15 to lose. I am soo there. Grrr...I hate setting a goal and not meeting it. But, I guess it is time to reset and start again. I will NOT give up on me this time.

Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis

All year long I emphasize and push my students to get involved in service. Make sure you do it, you will love it, you make new friends, you will learn so much about yourself, it is an easy way to give back. So many reasons why we all should. But, this past year I found myself wondering, Why don't I? I do Camp Fatima but other than that, all my service projects have disappeared. Some may claim my career to be service (haha), but I knew that I was lacking in my own spirituality because of this absence. Walking into ServiceWorx this summer, I felt good about the decision. I knew I wanted to find new places to volunteer and new ideas to further my own choice to help others. I have completed three out of the four weeks and my perspective is completely new. I want to do so much. I have helped at multiple senior centers, food banks, daycares and soup kitchens. But, I sat today with a woman who is what you would picture of a woman who is dying. She is in a wheelchair, can't manage to hold her own head up so her neck leans backwards, each word sounds more like a gasp for air than speech and she struggles to keep her eyes focused on you. Her name is Norma. It is important we all know her name. I sat down next to Norma and tried to hear what she was saying. I looked first to her eyes, bright blue. I saw a person there behind the clear glassy effect of the medications she takes. When I looked her in the eye, I realized that I could not hear what she was saying. So my focus moved to her mouth. Matybe I could read her lips? This approach worked but it took some adjustment since I struggled to look at her decaying teeth, her chapped mouth and the effects of gum disease taking form within. But, I focused on her words. Then I realized something...this is Norma. This is a woman who once danced with men, laughed with her family, cried over the struggles in life and has grown to an advanced stage of Alzheimer's. I listened to things she said to me for an hour and a half. Some easily understandable and some completely incoherent. I watched as she saw one of our ServiceWorx participants walk by and she laughed saying, "Oh she is beautiful!". I watched her jump out of fear and suprise when someone walked up behind her and approached her with no words. It is hard to say what I am learning this summer. I am being challenged to spend most of my days in senior citizen homes, which is the service I would least likely choose myself. But, I realize, if Norma can manage to lift her head, look me in the eye and speak her whole life to me...then I need to listen. This goes well beyond service, or summer jobs, or living what I teach. This is about seeing the face of God in all who live among us. Such an innocent, frail, trusting and needy person. I am so, so lucky to be able to look at this woman who has lived her life and sits in her home with hope and dignity every single day. It is so humbling and so eye opening to know, there are people in this world who are waiting on you. What the hell has taken me so long to get there?

It's pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness. Poverty and wealth have both failed. ~Frank McKinney "Kin" Hubbard

I have been having a week of insight. In so many little ways, through so many important people, I have been realizing how very great my life is. I hate writing blogs about this because it always seems so boastful. But, I just need to! I have been spending a lot of time with friends, family and my love. Being with everyone, in their own moments has made me just feel energized and truly, confident. It is so nice to be surrounded by people who have such good spirits. Jun and I have always said that we are lucky to have so many people in our lives that have good hearts. But, being able to have this week off and spend time with some of them makes me realize the depth of love in my life. It doesn't feel like the week is flying by or dragging on. It feels like I am truly living life to the fullest in every moment. Now, that may end now that I need to clean my house (haha!). But, even going back to work on Sunday is not going to be exhausting for me or challenging in anyway. I am looking forward to bringing a bit of this joy to people who may not have it or to those who seem to need it a bit more than I do. :)